Love and War in Your Twenties.

“Everyone has an innate desire to be known and seen, and that is a key part of being loved.”

I love music. So much. Instrumentals, jazz, indie pop, big band, folk, doowop, rap, r&b, gospel, lo-fi, slow, fast— all of it! Many of us could probably say that music has been the soundtrack to much of our life. You can hear a song and be reminded of a place or person from your past or present. Music can make you feel understood. It can help you to empathize with people who are different than you. It can motivate you, bring out sad emotions, or even euphoric ones. It is such a magical, inspired form of expressing life. 

Some of my fondest memories from college are of laying in my room with my roommate discovering music. Laying in silence, commenting here and there. Often, we would get in the car and drive just so we could jam to music. It’s wonderful getting to share music with someone. I often wonder if music can be a love language, because I’d definitely say it’s one of mine. I have playlists FILLED with music people shared with me that now is forever connected to those people and my memories of them. Music has become to me like a billion photographs seen through soundwaves. But what’s even more amazing, is that someone else listening to the same song, sees something totally different than I do. When a song is connected to a shared memory, that song now has the ability to let you walk into a time portal with another person, going on an imaginative journey to the past. With this journey, you drink a cup of emotions that are reminiscent of that place in time. 

Much like reading a good fiction book, music often teaches me and helps me with processing what I feel.

Some lyrics I’ve been thinking about lately are from a song called Love and War in Your Twenties by Jordy Searcy. This song would come up a lot on artist radios when my music finished playing, and to be honest for a long time I skipped it. I think I just wasn’t into the sound at the time—but I really don’t know (because now I can’t shut up about Jordy). I just skipped it. Until one day, I actually listened to it and was wowed by his interpretation of being in your twenties. 

I don’t wanna take the world for granted
While I’m still trying to understand it
The more I live, I am convinced
Everyone just wants to be in love

-Jordy Searcy (Love & War in Your Twenties)

(The whole song is good though—so listen to it!!)

The entirety of the song talks about how in your twenties you could do anything, go anywhere and love anyone. The options are endless—even though it doesn’t seem that way at times. Endless options can also be overwhelming, stirring up a restlessness—for then it begs the question of which option will lead to satisfaction? Which choice leads to feeling more alive and more connected to God and those around you? I don’t think Jordy was necessarily asking those questions in his song—that’s just the thoughts that came to mind as I thought on the song. 

The way he sings the line “I don’t wanna take the world for granted while I’m still trying to understand it” at the end of the song comes out in such a raw expression of the way he desires to live. I think when we’re still trying to figure things out there can be a hesitancy to engage with the world-hence taking it for granted. It feels like it makes sense to wait to put yourself out into the world until you’re done exploring, understanding, and know exactly who you’re meant to be in relation to the world. But being the finite beings that we are, we will never understand everything. Each new experience gives a new outlook on living, that is if we’re open to seeing things through different lenses. 

The second part of that stanza says, “The more I live, I am convinced Everyone just wants to be in love”. There’s much truth in that. I don’t think this means that everyone wants to romantically be in love. Everyone has an innate desire to be known and seen, and that is a key part of being loved. We were made for love and to love.

In a recent blog I wrote about my sadness with knowing that someday my days of living with my best friend will come to an end. I think out of all the relationships I have had in my life, some of my deepest feelings of love have been for her. She’s my person. She knows what I’m saying and feeling even when I don’t. I have watched this friend be literally transformed by the gospel—the greatest form of love. I love seeing her grow and flourish, and even more I have loved seeing the way she carries pain and heartache with such grace.

Essentially, I’m saying that I resonate with this line, because part of the reason my heart aches when I think of not living life as closely with her is because I don’t want the depth of this love to disappear. I enjoy waking up and annoying the heck out of her with my made up in the moment songs, I love when she rolls her eyes at me, or when I actually say something that makes her throw her head back in laughter, and I love when she lets me hug her even when that’s sooo not her love language. If it’s not obvious yet, I love her a lot! I better stop here though because this is turning into an ode to her. 

Honestly, I don’t have much of an ending conclusion to what these lyrics mean. I’m still thinking about it. If you listen to the song, I’d love to hear what stands out to you and how you interpret it. You better believe that the whole time I wrote this I was jamming out to Jordy Searcy to get me in the right headspace 😉

As always—thanks for reading,

P.S. Here’s some fun, completely unnecessary information for ya—a month or so ago I basically asked Jordy Searcy out (I have NEVER done that before). I’m insane, but hey I was genuinely interested, since I’d just discovered him, and he seemed so genuine and interesting. He gave me a kind no. What can I say except that my attraction trend seems to be kind, introspective, Jesus loving musicians—sue me. I found out later that he’s an enneagram 4 and SOMEHOW I almost always find out guys are 4s after I’ve started liking them. So weird. My best friend is a 4, so maybe that’s why. We jive well. Anyways—I’m over him now, and thankfully I still super enjoy his music. 

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